Baby’s First (and Last) Carnaval

So this past Monday and Tuesday were Carnaval, Bolivia’s most important holiday (the only holiday where two vacation days are given might I add) and a favorite of many Bolivians and tourists alike. I am not a fan. Let’s say that this holiday includes a lot of my least favorite things and just by sheer existence in this world I get included in those even though I did not ask to participate. All I have to say is the madness of Mardi Gras in New Orleans is preferred and that I am happy to say that I will probably be in Taiwan for Chinese New Year next year during Carnaval. I would highly recommend for anyone that was scared of attending Mardi Gras in New Orleans (Steph) to definitely not travel to any Latin American country during Carnaval. I am happily content in my change-of-plans decision to not travel to Oruro (craziest Carnaval in Bolivia) this year and will not be even considering traveling to Rio in Brazil anytime in the month before or after Carnaval.

I don’t like getting hit with water balloons. That’s the truth. During Carnaval it is perfectly acceptable to pelt strangers with water balloons, shoot them with water guns (yes, I saw a grown man shooting an old cholita with a supersoaker out a car window) and spray them with foam. I went into Cochabamba on the Monday of Carnaval and I was probably asking for it by just being there, but to experience that once is more than enough. The city was strangely quiet for the holiday with the exception of the Cancha (open air market) where I was warned things could get very ugly and messy. I was pleasantly surprised when I was able to walk from the Cancha (where the stop for the taxi-trufi from Tarata is) to the Cine Center with only minor incidents. But as I was making my way back to the Cancha to go home was another story. My first incident involved a group of teenage boys in a rotunda/plaza near the Cine Center (big American type movie complex). There had to be about 10 of them and I did my best to ignore them and just walk by…and honestly I wouldn’t mind if after I walked away they tried to pelt me with their balloons nor do I mind getting hit with a watergun that much. But one walked right up to me and stuck his hand under my chin with a balloon and popped it. I mean, come on, is that really called for? I did not appreciate that invasion of my personal space more than getting soaked. I did my best to ignore the fact that it happened and just walked away while they cackled in laughter and pelted me with a few more balloons. What I really wanted to do was punch him in the face but I could imagine my Carnaval experience degenerating into me beating up teenager boys and young children so I decided against it. That was then followed by my encounter with three younger children who hit me with at least 3 balloons and then as I kept on walking as if nothing happened, one of the little ones ran up behind me and sprayed my back (luckily raincoat covered) with a huge pile of foam. Direct hit from point blank range, not that impressive or satisfying in my opinion. I was then determined to walk back to the stop to get back home since I was already wet and as I neared the Cancha, I got a bucket of water dumped on my head. Yeah, I forgot that is acceptable as well…to dump buckets of water from balconies onto the people walking below you. Then as I was walking through the Cancha I heard more teenage boys going “get the chinita” and I literally ran to the other side of the street after I heard that.

Maybe it’s the lack of the potential lawsuit that allows this to happen in Bolivia, after all, in the U.S. you can sue anyone for just about anything, and it’s not unheard of for people around here to fill the balloons with paint, urine, or freeze them. There was that story of a motorcycle driver that got hit with an icy balloon last year and crashed and died. Right. Plus beyond that I’m sketched out by the fact that who knows what kind of water these buckets and water guns and balloons are filled with. I did see some kids filling some balloons from some skanky fountain filled with stagnant water. I’m just afraid of catching some disease by inadvertently getting some of the water in my mouth (hard to avoid when u get a full bucket dumped on your unexpectedly). There’s always typhoid fever which as one volunteer that contracted it by swimming in a river eloquently put it “I got poop in my mouth.” Which is apparently the way you get it when infected feces get in your mouth, usually through a contaminated water source.

Anyways, I sound like a whiny brat (Negative Nancy, Debbie Downer, any assortment of pessimistic nicknames) complaining about this because everyone experiences the same thing during Carnaval, but being less fun-loving than most volunteers and being less accustomed to it than Bolivians, I hate it that much more. Hopefully later this week when Carnaval is over, I can go back to worrying about pickpockets as my primary concern rather than walking around with the fear of getting hit by balloons and buckets of water.