An Indication That You Should Be Calling Your Friends More Frequently

Me: Helloooo!
Steph: Hello?
Me: Hey! You were screening my call! I called you like two seconds ago!
Steph: Oh, weird…you’re coming in as a long-distance number.
Me: I AM calling from a long-distance number. Hello? It’s me!
Steph: Oh! Joy?! Oh my god, I thought you were my mom!
Me: Your mom?!

Then we went on to have the regular conversation about grapes and starfruit.

Yes, now my friends think that I am their mothers. Is my voice matronly? I have gotten the occasional “do you have kids?” here and I was asked by one woman if I had kids at UBS because I liked to bake cookies and she said that my kids must love me when I bake for them. Hmm…I’m a little behind on peoples’ expectations so if anyone knows any strapping young lads that would like to father my children I am taking applications.

Also, I would like to happily inform you that the tally of the times that I’ve been asked if the blond-haired blue-eyed Pat is my mother has increased to 2 and counting. And I can also add to my credit the question if Pat is my mother-in-law. Haha, why can’t we just be friends?